If you're a single woman in her 40s and you've recently started dating a great guy who you think might be the man for you, congratulations!
You've successfully navigated meeting him and going on the first date plus a few more. Perhaps you two have gotten past the initial small talk and have started discussing a relationship together. Now what?
First of all, now that you're in your 40s, remember, you have all the time in the world. There is no need to race to exclusivity. Before you commit yourself to a relationship with this great guy, ask yourself, "Am I ready to take myself out of the dating pool?"
Before you remove yourself from the "after 40" dating scene, you want to make sure you've done a few things to be certain about what you're doing.
How Many Mature Men Have You Considered?
Have you met and dated at least 10 men in the past year or so? If you're close to that number, that's OK. 10 is just a guideline. It is not a strict requirement.
What Types of Men Over 40 Have You Dated?
Also, have you allowed yourself to consider some very different men than you dated when you were in your 20s and early 30s? Now that you're in your 40s, some of your husband requirements might still be the same as they were when you were younger. However, their order of priority might be different.
Let me give you an example. If now you're a divorced and single mom, then you are not looking for great potential father material. Your children, hopefully, still have their father. What you're looking for now is a man who would be a good step dad. A good step dad is typically more of a part-time job than a full-time job, unless your children's dad is no longer around. This is just to illustrate how your life is different now than in your 20s.
Does Your Man Have Time to Share with You?
Also, by now that you're in your 40s, you have an established career. You might not be looking for a man with massive earning potential because now you have that financial security and status yourself! What does that mean for you now for your after 40 mate selection? Naturally, you want a man who is financially stable. You also want a man who has enough time and outside interests to share himself with you and be an interesting life companion, right?
Now that you've considered what you want in a relationship and if you are saying yes to most of these questions, then, yes, by all means, agree to become exclusive! As the two of you start a relationship, remember to share both fun date nights going out as well as the daily activities of life, like grocery shopping together. Have fun and let me know how it's going.